Posts Tagged ‘Epi-genetics’

Fat vs. Fit

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

sumo-1

 

 

After my last trip to the Doc I had to ask myself the question; Is the goal to be thin or to be healthy?  According to his scales I have actually gained weight in the last little while and obviously I’m not happy about that.  It sent me into a pretty negative head space actually.   Having been a fat girl my whole life I was really hoping that even at this late stage I could change myself to being a skinny girl.  Yes I want to be healthy and that is still the goal, but a small part of me has always wondered what it would be like to be the skinny girl.  I feel shallow when I say that; I also feel that it is pretty unattainable.  For myself the balance is between doing things that make me feel good physically with the things that make me feel good mentally.  I want to enjoy my life as much as I can.  Currently I am incorporating  being healthy into enjoying my life.  I’ve been working at staying healthy and gradually getting fitter so the weight gain was a bit of a let down.

The confusing thing is that there are conflicting opinions about whether or not you will gain weight due to increasing muscle mass.  It may seem a bit arbitrary but I am going to chose to believe that my recent weight gain was indeed due to increased muscle.  I am definitely in better shape now than I have been in years.   Having gotten closer to the fit/fun ratio recently I also feel as though I have made some of the mental changes necessary to maintain a healthy lifestyle.  Now I have to forget about the skinny girl fantasy because It is unlikely that I will ever be consumed with exercise so much that I will get there.

Epi-genetics, a love of food and age are conspiring right now to keep me the way I am and always have been I suppose.  Please don’t take this as giving up, because I’m not.  I do however have to accept and be ok with the fact that I will never be super-model thin and quite frankly I would never want to be that unhealthy.